Kids & fighting

Why? Why must children fight over the most insignificant things ever? Today Jakob & Jackson were fighting over could open the front door. Really? Come on. There are some days where I think my head might just explode off my body. I don't understand it. It's days like these where the fighting starts the minute they all 3 get in the car together & I question what I was ever thinking. What was I thinking? Was I thinking , oh, I want 3 amazing kids that get along and have the perfect little family, or was I thinking I want 3 kids that drive me totally insane. There are days I honestly question my sanity & my job as a mother. OK , I'm sane just for the record but there are times I question it. Sometime I wonder if I'll be in the nut house before all my kids are grown. Maybe? I hope not, but we'll see.

Raven's Beautiful Disaster

The title "Raven's Beautiful Disaster" was chosen not because my name is Raven, but because for as long as I can remember that is what I've wished my name was. I wanted to name my daughter Raven but I never had one. I have 3 amazing sons instead. Beautiful Disaster came about because I have such a beautiful family, but it seems like everything I do or touch turns to be the biggest disaster ever.

Right now I'm just trying to find me. Trying to find where I fit in & what my purpose is for this life. Trying to find my own style, my own niche. I want to be myself & be happy with myself. Right now I am not. I don't like who I am. I'm tired of Myspace & Facebook seems so "fake" anymore. I'm trying something else. So come along for the ride. It should be bumpy if not a roller coaster.